St Valentine is the patron saint of lovers, romance, engaged couples, young people and, er, beekeepers. He also looks after, in his own way, jewellers, florists, greetings card manufacturers, restaurants, producers of red velvet and manufacturers of condoms, lingerie and beer goggles.
One should pray to St Valentine to heal a chagrin d'amour epilepsy, fainting or swooning, bee stings and the plague. I suppose we should throw in STDs, although using a condom is a better guarantee.
And he is, of course, the patron saint of chocolatiers. Valentine's Day is known in some parts of the Caribbean as the "Fiesta molto chocolata yaya". For Belgian chocolatiers it is one of the high points in the chocolate calendar, just behind Easter and Christmas.
One of life's cruel ironies is that Valentine's Day should fall a mere six weeks into my post-festive diet. Nary a Godiva praline will sully my fridge this year. I warned Bert. Unfortunately, being German, he tends to take things a bit too literally. He gave me a new set of go-faster stripes and a bulk pack of low-fat yoghurt. Wie romantisch.
For those of you who don't have a liturgical calendar to hand, may I take this occasion to remind you that Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent, is 11 days away, so if you did get chocolates for Valentine's Day, eat them now or be consigned to the fires of eternal damnation. I will be giving up low-fat yoghurt for Lent.
31 comments:
Surely you can indulge yourself just a little, Lady Daphne. Why not eat one very dark chocolate, very slowly? I will be thinking of you when you place it in your mouth.
Yey! It's Eric! Has he brought a tray of yoghurt this time?!
SX
Happy Valentine's Day!
I continue to be impressed by your self-restraint and fortitude. If not by your over-exuberant consumption of yoghurt. At least your innards will be healthy. I am giving up chocolate for Valentine's Day and indeed giving up romance for the day, as a last stand against the commercialisation of 'lurve'. And because M. Defarge has not bought me anything. Be grateful for Bert.
Why not try just eating raw cocoa? Kind of like when your dad catches you smoking and forces you to smoke (and inhale) a whole pack of King Edward VII's.
Pourquoi Valentin, Il n'y a pas de Valentin martyr ? La faute a "Faunus" sans doute !Les Luperques offraient la virginité d'une jeune fille .
Et William "Shakespeare" dit :
To-morrow is Saint Valentine's day.
All in the morning betime,
And I a maid at your window,
To be your Valentine.
Then up he rose and donned his clo'es
And dupped the chamber door,
Let in the maid, that out a maid,
Never departed more.
Je penche pour la solution la plus simple :
A la fin de l'hiver, les piafs s'accouplent à la mi-février...
Ce qui sans doute inspira "Trenet"
Vous êtes jolie, mon petit oiseau.
Près de vous les fleurs ne sont pas si belles.
La source qui court les fraîches eaux
N'ont pas votre voix, vous riez bien mieux qu'elles.
Que dire de vos yeux, de vos mains, de vos cheveux,
De tout votre corps de tout l'amour que je veux ?
Vous êtes pour moi la petite fée,
J'ai jamais compris ce qu'il y avait dans des yaourts allégés " du p'tit lait sans doute ! Celui qui était destiné jadis aux p'tits cochons :) "
Mon petit oiseau ,ma petite fée ,une bonne Saint Valentin
le petit bois
Daphne,
Thanks for the historical-religious perspective of Valentine's Day. I'm not sure why my curiosity for knowledge never led me in that direction. I can only say that this day has always challenged me to do something "romantically inspired". Since I happily swim in the river of bits and bytes the activity does have its degree of difficulty.
Nevertheless I will not allow my right-brain centric thinking to limit my romantic inclinations.
Happy Valentine's Day Daphne Wayne-Bough! A friend to romantics and chocolate lovers.
underOvr
St V's has it's uses in our household. The Annual Shag (please, Daffers, excuse my French), the renewing of my domain name and the renewing of Q's Private Eye subscription - it is rather useful.
And pray tell me that you do not put your Godiva chocolates in the fridge?
Blasphemy!
Ooh, toxic chocs from Belgium. Several years ago my brother turned up with an enormous cut-price box of Guylian: due to some chemical cock-up the Belgian milk supply had been laced with dioxin or PCBs or some such triviality. This depressed the price to the point where my brother recognized a smart investment opportunity. They tasted fine, all of them.
Yes, St. Valentine looked after my restaurants. They were full and refused many disappointed romantics.
We always over-order. I get the leftover chocolates and Karen gets the roses...
I'm on still on that post-festive diet too daffers, damn and blast the thing, I go a whole 8 hours without a morsel passing my lips and then it's bloody well breakfast time, then it's valentine's day, then it's the day after that. How can a girl win?
Alas, the Milk Tray man did not bring me a damp box of chocs this Valentines. My husband bought me the usual bunch of teeny weeny thongs and nippleless bras and I had to make do with that.
GB, dark chocolate is supposed to be good for you. But it just can't do what a Mars Bar can.
Scarlet, Eric? WTF is Eric?
Madame DeFarge, I suppose a low fat yoghurt is better than a kick in the teeth.
Gadj, I have cocoa in my kitchen, I can't understand why it's so horrible when chocolate's so scrummy.
Crabtree, merci pour la chanson de Monique Serf. Jolies chansons. Mais à mon avis il manquait à l'aigle noir la passion du petit Piaf, qui s'accouplait hors saison selon son humeur et les beaux yeux du jeune intendant.
U,you could attempt a blindfolded dive from the clifftop of common sense into the swirling maelstrom of the blogosphere - clutching your trusty box of digital Milk Tray of course. Always travel with a box of chocolates. You never know when you might get lucky.
Z (God this is starting to feel like Countdown), I see a good Catholic education has not gone to waste there, you navigate your year by the saints days. Yes I do put Godiva in the fridge - I like the feeling of them thawing out in my mouth.
Inky, Guylian are not Belgian chocolates, I don't care what it says on the box, they are made in China or somewhere. They are not to be mentioned in polite Belgian company. I wouldn't be surprised if they have got dioxin in them.
Krimo, glad to hear that business is still good despite the conjoncture. Northern Rock bonuses just came through, obviously.
Lulu, 8 hours is too long to go without eating. You should eat little and often, but nothing after 7 pm. Almost impossible in France, I know.
Emma, I hope they were from Agent Provocateur and not Ann Summers, which is cheap and nasty and will bring you out in a rash.
Chocolate???... you mean you can buy chocolate in Belgium? I missed that one.
Oops I've eaten all mine.
Maybe Eric is the chap on the video my dear Watson.
Pure cocoa tastes horrible ??
Maybe if you added palm-oil, glucose-fructose, hydrolyzed soy protein, calf-stomach extract, soy lecithin and artifical flavour* you'd find it more to your taste ?
*© Mars, Inc
Brom, yes you can buy it in a shop the other side of the pub, but of course you never make it that far.
Pat, I checked out the ad's credentials on the internet and the major Milk Tray man was called Gary. So who, dear Scarlet, is Eric? Like the new photo by the way, Pat!
Ché, they're delicacies where you come from.
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